John Mayer is on the cover of Rolling Stone. Are any of you fans? If so, I recommend you don’t read the article because he gives quotes like: “Blowing me off is the new sucking me off!” Could he be a less appealing person? Maybe if he posed with his flabby chest on display in disgusting sweatpants…
Oh.
Or maybe if he trash talked his exes some more. Oh wait. John isn’t over gloating about how he dumped Jennifer Aniston. “I’ve never really gotten over it,” he says. “It was one of the worst times of my life… I have this weird feeling, a pride thing, for the people I’ve had relationships with. What would I be saying to Jen, who I think is fucking fantastic, if I said to her, ‘I don’t dislike you. In fact, I like you extremely well. But I have to back out of this because it doesn’t arc over the horizon. This is not where I see myself for the rest of my life, this is not my ideal destiny.'”
It doesn’t arc over the horizon? Seriously, if someone said that to me during a break up I would punch them in the face.
John also said he has stopped dating now and started “to fuck the girls I’ve already fucked,” because girls can’t believe he could be “interested in them, and they’re going, ‘But you’re John Mayer!'”
Maybe they mean: but your John Mayer and you’re disgusting get away from me?
Oh, I really hate to hear this, because I love his music. I am a serious music-junkie, especially guitar, and some of his stuff recalls old-school Clapton. But I have heard rumors that he’s quite the douche bag and – damn – apparently it’s all true.
BTW, who in their right minds thought that was a good cover? It’s not sexy or provocative, it’s just gross.
Chris: I feel like maybe someone at Rolling Stone also hates him?
I am laughing so hard. Your assessment is so funny and sadly true.
Beth: glad you thought this was funny. I was hoping no one was too much of a John Mayer fan and would leave pissed comments like… has happened when I said something slightly bad about a certain Twilight star’s hair. 😉
what a douche.
“It doesn’t arc over the horizon? Seriously, if someone said that to me during a break up I would punch them in the face.”
Seriously, Valerie, your getting funnier and funnier. I also would punch someone in the face if they said this. But I’d just like to punch Mayer in the face for shits and giggles. He positively SUCKS.
sarah: if I ever see him in out in la, I’m going to kick him in the shins.
Ew is right. I didn’t like his music from the start. Your Body Is A Wonderland just gave me the creeps…I don’t want to hear about that!
suzanne: that song was playing on a loop in my head the entire time I was writing this post.
I have to say, I still love him. He can act like the biggest douche on the planet and I’d still let him crawl in bed with me. I think he acts this way because its what people expect of him, I don’t think deep down thats the way he really is. ahhh if I wasn’t such a sucker for you John…lol.
stop talking trash about john.i’m a big fan of his music and you guess you people dont have the ability of writing great songs so you envy him